Have you been struggling trying to make ends meet? You work every day, get paid, and your check is gone before it even hits your account? Have you ever been so low that you’ve had nothing and could do nothing but drop to your knees and pray for a better situation, to be able to make it through the rest of the week, for a blessing or a miracle? Have you ever went to bed hungry so your child could eat?
It’s been a long, stressful, hard four months for me and my family. After giving birth to my twins I was off work almost 8 weeks with no pay. My boyfriend worked 16 hr days for six months before having our babies so when they were born he decided to quit his job so he could be home to help me especially since I had a c-section. Our original plan was to save money from our taxes but life hit us on a rainy day so we had to make other plans. I worked until I was 37.5 weeks pregnant (5 days before my scheduled c-section). We needed to pay a few bills up since we knew I wouldn’t be getting paid. We were doing fine.
It was not until I went back to work when things began to take a turn. My first check I was to receive after being back at work did not come for a whole TWO weeks causing me to fall short. Rent was due, lg&e was due, car payment was behind (they truly worked with me) and my insurance had canceled. I had to make choices on the bills I needed to pay. My top priority was rent because I have way to many babies to be homeless. So I let the LG&E go without being paid thinking I could make it until the next week. Well I didn’t make it to the next week, lights were off. It was at this moment I knew I had hit my lowest. I was embarrassed and ashamed all I could do was cry. I knew that I was going to have to do something I truly hated doing “Ask for help”. I didn’t get paid for another week and my babies could not be with no electricity. My mother helped me but also had me go to one of those churches for assistance. At first I was like “Hell no, ain’t nobody going to catch me begging”. She put me in my place real quick. She explained to me that it was not about me, it was about my children. It takes a REAL mother to step aside and ask for help. She made me realize that I was never too good for help. So I went down there and got my assistance. It just so happened one of her long term friends worked there and got me every kind of assistance possible. It helped me but it didn’t fix my situation completely.
I am still struggling to this day. Some days I have $0 until I get paid. I can’t always afford gas and my refrigerator is sometimes empty (I don’t get food stamps) so we eat at my parents, boyfriends grandma or we eat out. I don’t always have lunch to send my son to school with like he use to. The bills are still coming and some are still behind. I may look like I have it all together but in reality I don’t. I am a work in progress though. Somehow I always seem to make the ends meet. My boyfriend is a stay at home dad/college student. I work two jobs so he can finish school. While I was in school I didn’t work and he handled everything so now I’m returning the favor. It’s not always easy and some days it’s hard for him to see me work so hard but I remind him that we’re doing this for him and his future.
We’re doing just fine. We see the light at the end of the tunnel. God has always been on our side. We could have lost everything but we didn’t. We know there is people in worst situations than us. So we wake up humble ready to accomplish each day. God has to break us down to build us back up. I never knew what it was like to be struggling with three kids because I only had one, but I’m glad God is showing me because I know it’s a feeling I never want to feel again. We have our children to keep us going. Tough times don’t last forever, tough people do 💪🏿🤞🏿❤️